I'm taking the time to write you this letter in hopes you will comply with this one simple request, QUITE COCK-BLOCKING me!
No matter where i am, you are ready to thwart my attempt to meet new people. You, with your smudged veneer and beady little ear-buds... I see a cute redhead on the bus - Bam! There you are pumping Rihanna into her ears. See a hot brunette in the cafe - Bam!. Shes off in her own world, listening to Taylor Swift. And you've had the balls to invade the gym! How am i supposed to get any if you're making it impossible to start a conversation?
Oh, i know you and your little friends think you're the center of the universe - you come out of your box all white, skinny and futuristic. You think you're hot shit, but let me tell you something, that shine wont last. No pretty soon a big black thumb print is going to develop on your face and it will never come off. then your owner is going to start looking around at new ipods. and decide that you're to bulky to schlep around anymore, and then you'll wish you had an all - someone to dissuade them from replacing you. Someone to say, sure we don't know you want a new ipod, but do you really need one? I could be your ally, but I don't know your owner- I never got an opportunity to talk to her, because you were hogging her head for the whole damn train ride home!
So enjoy shuffling thought those same old tired playlists while you can, because your days are numbered.
Dear ipod;
I'm taking the time to write you this letter in hopes you will comply with this one simple request, QUITE COCK-BLOCKING me!
No matter where i am, you are ready to thwart my attempt to meet new people. You, with your smudged veneer and beady little ear-buds... I see a cute redhead on the bus - Bam! There you are pumping Rihanna into her ears. See a hot brunette in the cafe - Bam!. Shes off in her own world, listening to Taylor Swift. And you've had the balls to invade the gym! How am i supposed to get any if you're making it impossible to start a conversation?
Oh, i know you and your little friends think you're the center of the universe - you come out of your box all white, skinny and futuristic. You think you're hot shit, but let me tell you something, that shine wont last. No pretty soon a big black thumb print is going to develop on your face and it will never come off. then your owner is going to start looking around at new ipods. and decide that you're to bulky to schlep around anymore, and then you'll wish you had an all - someone to dissuade them from replacing you. Someone to say, sure we don't know you want a new ipod, but do you really need one? I could be your ally, but I don't know your owner- I never got an opportunity to talk to her, because you were hogging her head for the whole damn train ride home!
So enjoy shuffling thought those same old tired playlists while you can, because your days are numbered.
I hate all that you represent.
http://www.ihatemyipod.com/hate_442/